Is it okay or is it the biggest mistake?

So here's a question for all you out there why is it that when we have the seemingly perfect guy, relationship, and sex life we somehow get all paranoid if we are pleasing them. I mean if they are having as much fun as we are then when they say they need space for a little bit does that mean they want a break from the sex or a break from the whole thing? Then there's the fact that what if you are the one asking for the break and are in a relationship with no labels and aren't technically together and end up running into an old boyfriend or just friend you've always liked and sleep with them, should you tell your almost boyfriend or just count it as no problem because your not his girlfriend? I just wonder each side of the male and female's objective and opinion on the subject of "is sex okay with others when your not completely together with your man/woman?".

This is off all my topics, but, had to share.

So today got a call from my girl sara and she got the new kindle wireless reading thing and I had to see it. It is awesome the kindle has a 6" display, and works globally with free 3g and wi-fi so awesome right. I wanted one and asked where she got her's and she told me to go to amazon and she was right it's only $189, and for someone like me the fact that the kindle has a no glare feature is fantastic it's like I can wear my reading glasses without the shining light in my face anymore. Plus the kindle is lighter and holds more books which is great for people like me who already have like 300 books at home and keeps going to the library for more, it hold over 3,500 books how perfect for all the avid readers out there like me and my girl sara, and downloading them only takes like a minute so all those people out there who are as impatient to read the next book in the series we all read doesn't have to sit there for hours to read it. It's one of the best if I have to say so myself, me and sara are reading the girl with the dragon tattoo by vintage and read the new stephenie meyer book the short second life of bree tanner, both amazing books and practically free. So if your looking for a device thingy like this you should totally check out amazon.com for the new kindle wireless I know I will, once I'm done reading that is.

A poem for those who have also felt alone even when thier surrounded.......

I AM......
I am alone, surrounded by friendship
I wonder do I have a heart left to love
I hear thunderstorms behind my tears
I see fuzzy images of my future so unsure what is next for me
I want something all my own, that seems to never come close enough to grab.......
I pretend to smile everyday
I feel lost without someone to show me there is still light in the world, to show me the way
I touch my pulse and don't know if I 'm pretending that too without knowing it...
I worry a friend is all I will ever be in this life...
I cry every night knowing all I've lost is only going to get worse til it's me who's next in line...
I understand the books I read more than my own life...
I say I love you without meaning because I've lost the knowledge of what it feels like anymore...
I dream of day I'm truly happy above all my pain
I try to forget my past and what awaits tomorrow
I hope someday my life winds down and starts to make sense again...
I am alone, surrounded by friendship, will it always be enough to keep me waking-up everyday?
Or will the pain I subside in the back of heart burst...killing me...?

Why them?

I have seen more than my share of break-up's and all I can figure is why them? I mean those women we blame for taking, stealing, corrupting our relationship's with our men. Well what I have to say is what is wrong with us it's not our fault, the other woman's fault, or even our man's fault for all that drama to take place. I wonder if men like us have been so used to seeing other men as they grew up moving onto the next woman and even though they know it's wrong are they just as screwed up in the back of their minds as we women are. Is it all just programed in us by what we have seen? So my question of the day is why them, so to all the women left for another woman, all the women who seem to have taken a man from another woman, and those men who are just stuck in a bad cycle I leave this question up to you all to discuss and hell maybe we will finally have an answer to the time old question, why them?

Past Repeating Itself?

We have all been there, the whole I love you both, but, I think I love one of them more. Well here is my stand point in life at the moment, I'm stuck between two amazing men. One - a guy I have know most of my life and we never got the chance to date because we were always just friends then he moved, Two - a guy I have only know for a few years, but, none-the-less he has fallen as hard for me as I have for him. So is it too much to just call it quits when your dating guy number two and guy number one falls back into your life and start anew. Or should we try to make the relationship with guy number one stay friends, and stay with guy number two. Or are we going to do what everyone seems to and repeat an ancient mistake and let guy number one sweep us off our feet with ease and risk guy number two? I personally would love to have that book with all the answers, but, nope I am stuck like everyone else. So as I think this through and even as I am typing this the old question pops into my head I have already gone through this and have before lost a different guy number two and had guy number one leave me, so are we all just learning new situations or are we now after so many relationships programed to repeat our mistakes with new people?